My Last Breath
by Psycho Goddess
Summary: During the big scene in X2, Jean has a brief reflection before the water comes. Accompanied by
1. Default Chapter

I admit it, as a child I had a great love for the cartoon version of X Men, and I love the movies still. I admit I'm a geek! Not that anybody cares. Anyways, I saw X2 last night and decided to write this piece and another, accompanying one titled "In Dreams ", a Scott's POV after Jean's death. Reviews for both are appreciated. This is a songfic, based off of "My Last Breath" by Evanescence. Amazing group, by the by.

Anything you recognize isn't mine, you figure it out.

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

She ran down the ramp quickly, her mind racing furiously ahead of her. She had to do this, she had to. She just wished she could block out Scott's voice calling for her.

The water was coming. She stopped it without rational thought, lifted the jet. 

_ Concentrate. _

There it was. 

Higher. 

_ Must concentrate. _

Faster. 

_ Concentrate. _

Up_. _

_ Concentrate._

Can't lose focus.

**_ Concentrate._**

She was losing strength, she felt her hold waver. A last desperate burst of power lifted the jet out of harm's way. She let her hold go.

-*-*-*-

"Welcome back sweetheart."

Scott's voice. She opened her eyes to stare at him. He was sitting on the foot of the bed, worry creasing his brow.

"Scott. What happened?" Memories danced beyond her grasp. Something about water. And fire. What was she doing here? She felt that it was wrong somehow.

"Don't you remember? The dam broke, and you got off the Blackbird. I almost lost you."

That couldn't be. But she remembered it now. 

"You can't get rid of me that easy, Summers." 

"I'll try harder next time." He almost smiled. But there was still that worry.

"I'm okay Scott. Tired, but I feel fine."

He moved closer to her, reaching for her hand. She felt a surge of guilt when she noticed how his trembled ever so slightly. It must have been bad.

-*-*-*-

_Hold on to me love  
You know I can't stay long  
All I wanted to say was I love you and I'm not afraid  
Can you hear me?  
Can you feel me in your arms?_

-*-*-*-

"Come here."

She placed his hand on her breathing chest. 

"I'm alive. That's all that matters Scott, that I can be here with you at this moment. I love you. Don't even think about it. It's in the past, and I'm here now. Nothing could be better."

He drew her to him, their bodies so near she could feel him quiver.

"It was so close…I don't know…I can't…" he trailed off. Another word and he would burst into tears. 

-*-*-*-

_ Holding my last breath  
Safe inside myself  
Are all my thoughts of you  
Sweet raptured light it ends here tonight_

-*-*-*-

"You would have found a way. I'm not afraid of dying Scott, just of dying without your love. As long as you love me, I'll never really be gone. I promise, I'd be right beside you. Celebrating your victories, and guiding you in tough times, they way you always have for me. And I'd make sure you found happiness."

"The only thing that makes me happy is you, Jean. Anyone else would be nothing more then a cheap imitation. You can never settle for second best, not for love at least."

"You'll never have to. I'm too stubborn to die. There are too many good memories. 

"Bad ones too," he interjected.

"But mostly good ones," she told him firmly

He ran his hand through her hair, a smile playing on his lips. "There are a lot of good ones, aren't there?"

"More then I deserve."

"Remember that snowball fight. You were dressed up, and on the walk to the restaurant you just bent over and hurled a snowball my way."

She laughed. "We ended up soaking wet. The maître d' threw us out!"

"So we ended up in McDonald's dressed in evening clothes!"

-*-*-*-

I_'ll miss the winter  
a world of fragile things  
look for me in the white forest  
hiding in a hollow tree (come find me)  
I know you hear me  
I can taste it in your tears_

-*-*-*-

She leaned over and kissed him. He tasted the way she always remembered. It was comforting to know he was there. He hadn't given up on her. He must have gone back despite the odds and brought her home. Whatever higher power had given him to her was too generous. 

"I love you Scott Summers. Nothing could ever change that."

"And I you, Jean Grey. I'd just like to see someone try to stop me."

She looked at his face once more, studying every detail. He was so beautiful. She closed her eyes, his kiss still lingering on her lips. She was content.

-*-*-*-

_ Holding my last breath  
Safe inside myself  
Are all my thoughts of you  
Sweet raptured light it ends here tonight_

-*-*-*-

But it was all just a dream dreamt in that brief second before the icy waters hit. 

She was too tired to fight it. Closing her eyes, she welcomed it. She was engulfed by darkness.

_ I love you Scott_.

The darkness was seemingly gone as quickly as it had come, replaced by a warm glow. She knew she wasn't saved though, just placed in a different death. She hoped Scott would understand.

-*-*-*-_  
  
Closing your eyes to disappear  
You pray your dreams will leave you here  
But still you wake and know the truth  
No one's there  
  
Say goodnight  
Don't be afraid  
Calling me calling me as you fade to black_


	2. Author's Note

Brief author's note: This will be taken down within the week, but I felt a need to  
comment on one thing and ask a general question. So I'm not openly ignoring site  
rules, just altering them for a short time. Hopefully it won't upset anyone.  
  
Xfan: Yes, I did see the shape at the end. I suppose I wrote it the way I wrote it  
because Jean could easily think she is dead, or her "possession" by the Phoenix (a  
theory only LOL) is a form of death in her mind.  
  
Corrinth I'm a morbid person ;-)  
  
SpikesLittleBit Thanks for the nice coments :-) I love the sound of the band, it's fresh  
but classical at the same time.   
And the big evil question of doom is very simply, is anyone interested in a continuation  
of this story, using the above chapter as a prologue? OR is there enough poorly written  
fics out there on the topic? Feedback would be appreciated :-D 


	3. Homecoming

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters, events, or anything else related to the story. In fact, I'm personally laying bets on what a bad idea it is. Oh well, I do stupid things like this often. *grins* Oh, and some things may not make much sense unless you've read "In Dreams", so I suggest you do! 

The previous chapter can be read alone, so if you aren't interested in reading a fic dealing with how Jean's return affects everyone at the Institue, there's no need to continue. Otherwise, enjoy!

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

She wasn't sure what she would say, what there was that could be said. She hardly remembered the walk to the nearest town, but she knew it was long. She hardly remembered what she was doing there, but she knew it was bad. She hardly knew why it felt as if her heart was shattered, but she knew that the answers lay south. 

She hopped onto the first bus, headed for a prep school in upstate New York.

-*-*-*-

For what seemed to be the millionth time, Scott Summers looked over the letter. 

_If I were to live with to a thousand, it would never be long enough to love you. So I'll **need** to see you again. And it may take time, but I promise I will._

Somehow it made the pain less real, the false promise of a reunion. He knew the Professor was worried that he wouldn't move on, that he wouldn't push on. It was a needless worry, the reason for him to stay was in that letter.

But at the moment the only thing he wanted was to get through the days that seemed to stretch forever, and to escape the memories. 

The students were being more patient with him then he deserved. They were unusually quiet, and every assignment was handed in on time. He quickly swallowed the last of his drink, and stumbled off to bed.

-*-*-*-

She was sitting in a corner when he came in.

"Scott!"

She stood to hold him, but he shied away.

"Scott? What? Is that...?" She didn't believe it, but the smell was unmistakable.

"Scotch? Yeah."

"But you hate that stuff, Scott!"

"Whatever gets me through the night."

She raised her hand to touch his face, but he stepped back to avoid her.

"What's going on? Scott, tell me."

She couldn't believe the changes that had come over him in such a short time. She was the cause of those changes, she was the reason he was hurting. And all she wanted was to make it better.

"This isn't real. It's the alcohol talking, and I'm not going to acknowledge it. Jean is dead. Dead! I watched her die! I could have stopped her! But I didn't!"

She sighed. Trust him to take the blame.

"If that's what you think, then it must be true. I suggest you sleep it off." She sat down in her chair, and watched him. 

Within moments his chest was moving up and down rhythmically, and the smallest of snores was escaping his lips. She smiled through the tears running down her cheeks. He was so incredible, that man. 

There was so much she still had to do, people she had to see. But it could wait for morning. And if it couldn't, that was too bad. She crossed the room and lay beside her husband, sighing as she snuggled into the familiar crook of his arms.

-*-*-*-

Consciousness came in stages for Scott Summers.

First came the earliest inklings of wakefulness, and the feel of a woman in his arms. Jean. Beautiful, amazing, wonderful Jean. The woman he would wake up beside for every day of his life. It made everything worthwhile, knowing that.

Second came the realization that Jean was gone, but the woman was still in his arms. She had Jean's lemony scent too, but that didn't help. How could he have…?

The third stage came quickly, the knowledge that opening his eyes would bring his sanity crashing down. The woman stirred, and he knew the inevitable moment was upon him.

Much to his surprise, it was her brown eyes that were staring back at him. It was her lips that kissed him good morning. It was her hands that brushed back his hair. It was her waist his arm was curled around. And it was her voice.

"Did you have a good night, Mr. Summers?" she asked quietly, eyes sparkling.

"The best sleep in over a week." 

Neither one mentioned why, but the topic hung in the air.

"Good," was all she said, and all that was needed.

-*-*-*-

It was much later that the couple made their way to the kitchen for breakfast, arms around one other. From the time they had woken up, they had not broken contact. It seemed to be tempting fate once too often. They had avoided discussing anything to do with Alkali Lake, and at the moment neither one cared for the how of it.

The few students they met stared for a moment before breaking out into smiles and running off to tell the good news. Dr. Grey was back! 

Charles Xavier glanced up from his newspaper only briefly.

"Hello Jean. I would have thought you'd have announced your presence last night."

She grinned. "Well, I decided to sleep first. There's plenty of time to get back to the daily grind of life. I assume it was you that disabled the security system?"

"Of course. I also figured you had some explaining to do to certain people that didn't need interrupting."

_ Thank you, _ she told him. 

-*-*-*-

Logan was sitting in the common room when he heard. Jean alive? Here? He stood up, already on the prowl for the only woman to ever haunt his dreams. He had to make her see…

……………………….

TBC, Reviews appreciated. Definitely an intro-to-actual-plot chapter. Sorry if it was unbearably boring.


	4. Dinner Dates

xJeanGreyx: Hopefully this counts as more fanfictions. ^-^

Cass: The shape at the end was pretty cool looking 

Tournesol: Me? Plot idea? *falls over laughing* I'm famous for writing long stories with no plots. lol

Lia: First, thanks for the lovely email and review. I do so very like surprising people at the last minute. It's all convenient plot devices, and I've been fooled once or twice by the technique myself.

Steph: It's always great to hear that a reader has taken something away from the story. And the song is enough to make me cry, mostly because the rock-ish music makes the mournful vocal sound even more heartbreaking. 

Xfan: Here's the continuation! Hopefully it remains up to standard.

Jean_grey: The first piece is a prologue to the story. And I've read the Wheel of Time series for so long I can't imagine actually having a prologue that bears relevance to the rest of the story. 

x-freak010: This baby isn't going anywhere. Heck, even I'm starting to like it. Lol

Opal: I doubt my muses would let the 'ship go any other way. They can be pretty violent.

Nani?: Ahh, "touching". One of the best words a writer will ever hear.

King Zoe: "Lovely". Another one of those magic words. ^-^

Zi Marquise: That CD is wonderful, isn't it? I've cried at a few of the tracks, as embarrassing as that is to admit. 

All reviewers: Thanks for the generally great feedback! For the first time in my writing "career", it's been the reviewers that have inspired me to work on the story. Thanks!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Logan wasn't surprised to find her with Scott. And he hardly blamed the man for the hold he had around her. Hell, if he was in that position, he doubted he'd let Jean out of his sight for a minute. 

But there was still that brief moment of pain when he was reminded who it was she loved. That overbearing, uptight son of a bitch she called her husband. He had come to grudgingly respect Scott Summers, but he'd never like him. Especially when he was kissing Logan's girl.

She looked up when he entered, and he couldn't help but notice the way her lips curled when she smiled. 

"Hello Logan."

Nothing more. No "Good to see you", no "What are you doing here?". Nothing. 

Scott gave him what could only be a look of amusement before whispering into her ear and slipping out a side door. She stood after he left, and wrapped her arms around Logan.

"Welcome home Jeannie," he whispered into her hair. He wondered if she knew how crazy the lemon scent drove him.

"Thank you for telling Scott the truth," was all she said, drawing back. She smiled once more, and exited the room.

~*~*~*~

Jean was shaking as she left. 

"_Dinner, tonight. Be ready for 8."_

She had thought of arguing with him. There was doubtlessly a back up of work she had to complete, and other matters to see to.

He had simply argued that he needed her, away from the school, away from the X Men, and the unspoken need to be away from Wolverine. 

_ When was the last time we were alone?_

She was surprised at the answer. A long time. They were busy people, ones who rarely saw each other except for nights. They had always made a point to spend part of every day together, but they had slipped up. Busy exam schedules, missions and work had taken up their time. The only times they had gone out lately was as chaperones for field trips.

She felt a surge of guilt. Why had it taken the experience at Alkali Lake to realize what it was she was taking for granted, what they both were? 

~*~*~*~

Amelia Black was waiting outside the bedroom when Jean arrived.

"Dr. Grey," was all she got out before bursting into tears.

Jean wrapped her arms around the student, and brought her inside.

"Amelia, what's wrong?"

Jean listened in silent horror as the girl spilled her darkest secrets. Childhood abuse she had repressed until the only mother figure she ever had died, causing nightmares that Jean could not imagine.

"Shh, shh," she whispered, hoping to comfort her. "It's okay, I'm here. I'll help you. We all will. It's okay."

They sat that way for over an hour, both teacher and student crying. In the end, it was Amelia who moved. Wiping tears from her eyes, she gave her bravest smile. 

"I have classes. I should go."

"You don't have to go if you don't want to."

"I'll be okay. I just needed to get that out."

"I'll be here if you need me."

"I know."

~*~*~*~

She turned on the hot water and let the tears come. She had felt that twist of pain that Scott still hadn't forgotten, Amelia's memories, everything. It was too much. How had she done that to people she cared for?

It wasn't until much later that the tears stopped, and she stepped out of the shower. She wrapped a bathrobe around herself and sat on the edge of her bed. Exhaustion overtook her, and she fell into a dreamless sleep.

~*~*~*~

Scott went to his room to get dressed. The first thing he noticed was Jean asleep on the bed, a telltale trail of tears on her cheeks. 

At that moment he knew there was never a more perfect woman, with her disheveled hair and that half smile on her lips. He hoped her dreams were as happy as his when he was with her.

He brushed her lips with his, and she stirred. 

Half opened eyes looked at him with sleepy amusement. "Hey."

"Hey sleepyhead."

Her eyes widened when she saw the time on the alarm clock. 

"We're late," she accused, jumping out of bed.

"Forget it, we'll do dinner tomorrow."

"How many times have we said that lately? Now, out! I have to get ready."

"But I'm not…" he tried to protest.

She pulled a suit out of the closet, stuffed it into his arms and pushed him out the door.

~*~*~*~

She was stunning. There was no other word he could use. The navy blue gown set off her colouring beautifully, and her hair fell in the softest of waves. How she had managed that look in ten minutes was beyond him.

Logan watched from the games room as she swept down the stairs with unrivalled grace into the waiting arms of her lover. He could help but notice the extra bounce in her step, the special twinkle in her eye, the smell of contentment rolling off her in waves. She was in love, no doubt.

Ororo drew up beside him, silently watching the events unfold.

It wasn't until the couple had left that either one of them spoke.

"Where they going?" he asked gruffly. Part of him wanted to track her down there, woo her, and carry her off.

"McDonalds."

His surprise was evident.

"It's a long story."

"I'd love to hear it."

"You see, it all started with a plan and a snowball…"

……………………………….

Reviews and feedback appreciated. 

Up next: Dinner, the truth about Mickey Dees and a whole lot more! So stay tuned! Unless of course I've bored you to death! Sorry!


End file.
